When we are stressed and have a lot on our plate, sometimes the last thing we want to do is engage in a daily mindfulness practice.

We tell ourselves that we don’t have the time or can’t do it. We come up with lots of reasons why not.

What we focus on is what we get more of in our lives. So, let’s focus on what it’s like to be mindful and feel the benefits of our mindfulness practice.

If you don’t have a daily mindfulness practice or haven’t been engaging with your Mindfulness App, don't stress.  There are simple tools that you can engage with to minimize stress and feel more content.

BREATHE

Breath work reduces stress and is a vital part of any mindfulness routine. Here are three breathing techniques to help you release, relax, and let go:

#1. Breathe in through the nose and out through the nose with the out-breath longer than the in-breath. 

Listen to music that you love or anything that you find calming and supportive as you breathe.

#2. Breathe in through the nose and out through the nose with no pause between the in-breath and the out-breath. 

You breathe in through your nose until your lungs are almost full and out through your nose until your lungs are almost empty.

Weather permitting, you can breathe sitting outside, connecting with nature and allowing yourself to feel grounded into the earth and fully present here now.

#3. Breath in through the nose and hold your breath for a moment. Breathe out through the mouth and hold your breath for a moment. 

You can count to five breathing in through the nose, hold for four, and count to five breathing out of the mouth, hold for four. 

Next, breathe in through your high heart or heart chakra, filling yourself with love, and breathe out feeling yourself expand and ground into the planet.

Practice these breathing techniques for three minutes or more every day. You can focus on one, two, or all of them, whatever feels right to you.

Breathing helps you:

to switch from fight or flight to rest and relax mode.

to feel calm and able to handle whatever life presents.

to let go of what's been causing you to contract and play small.

to have more space to be your best self.

HAVE FUN & LAUGH

Laughter is literally the best medicine. 

When you have a good heartfelt laugh, something naturally releases.  You feel lighter, clearer, and brighter, like you’ve dropped a heavy load. 

Need help?

Try Laughter Yoga; there are laughter yoga groups all around the world.

Watch funny videos on YouTube by standup comedians.

Watch movies and TV shows and series that are comedies.  There’s a wide variety on Netflix, Amazon Prime, and many other platforms.

Hang out with friends who bring lightness and joy to your life.

Engage in hobbies that promote feelings of well-being, like gardening, listening to upbeat music, and dancing. 

Make it a priority to find ways and time to laugh and feel better about yourself and life.

MAINTAIN HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS

Healthy relationships help you to enjoy a love-filled life, and focus on what uplifts you and the way you see and experience the world.

Here are some tips for maintaining healthy relationships:

#1. Be compassionate and empathetic with the people you love and care about. 

Be affectionate.  Say kind and supportive things. Share a good, heartfelt hug.  

Be grateful for and appreciative of your family, friends, and partner. Allow them to express love, appreciation, and gratitude for you. Love is enhanced when we are both giving and receiving.

#2. If something happens to disrupt a healthy, loving relationship like an argument or disagreement, breathe and review what happened.

How did you contribute to the interaction, if at all?  What could you do differently next time if something similar arises?  

Visualize a new loving healthy reality where there was once strife.

How does it look and feel?

What did you clear and release to get there?

How do you feel inside now?

Once you have released the charge, have a conversation. Share how you feel.  Apologize and make amends if need be. Always ask yourself: What would love do now? How may I best serve?

We can only control ourselves. What our partner, family or friends do is up to them.

And some people and groups are toxic and do not belong in our lives. The relationship is neither healthy nor supportive and needs to end. It’s important to love ourselves enough to terminate toxic relationships, review why we manifested them, and what we’ve learned from the experience.

Focus on your re-choosing:  attracting and enjoying healthy relationships. And take action on the ground, one step forward at a time, to make it so.

PETS

Our pets can be a great source of comfort and companionship. They bring us laughter and joy. Be grateful for the pets in your life and have graced your life. What are some memories that touch your heart, moments that you cherish and make you smile?

Even if you don’t have pets, remember interactions with the animal kingdom you enjoyed, such as horseback riding, swimming with dolphins, and whale watching.  

Remember what you love and cherish about our beautiful animal kingdom.

ACCEPT YOURSELF AS YOU ARE

How you feel about yourself is a choice. Everyone makes mistakes. The key is to see your mistakes as an opportunity to learn and grow. 

What could you do differently next time when a similar situation arises? How will that look and feel?

No matter what’s going on in your life, you can love and accept yourself as you are, warts and all. You have strengths and weaknesses. You have bits that are shiny and bright and bits that are not. 

Everyone does.  No one is perfect.

Sometimes you need to adopt new habits because what you’ve been doing no longer works. Sometimes you need to forgive others and accept where they are at.  That takes courage and self-determination.

Some ways that you can nurture your feeling of acceptance are:

#1. Choosing to coach yourself positively, to be an inner coach instead of an inner critic.  This means championing yourself, talking to and supporting yourself the same way you would a dear friend.

#2. Working with affirmations, such as: I am worthy of love. I am worthy of success. I am choosing to love and accept myself as I am. 

#3. Visualizing success, for example: Taking time each day to see yourself taking steps forward, achieving goals, being positive and loving, and doing things that make your heart sing.

EMBRACE SPIRITUALITY

It’s uplifting to embrace your spirituality, having faith and trust that what will eventuate is love. Faith and trust are sacred qualities that uplift and support you to be your best.

Support your faith and trust with affirmations, mindfulness, and meditation. 

Affirm: I love and accept myself as I am. 

Breathe and bring more love and acceptance into your life. Breathe and welcome more joy and laughter into your life. Breathe and let go of what’s not serving you. Breathe, and be with people who enhance your life and support your evolution and growth.

Spend time loving yourself. 

If you have trouble loving yourself, pick someone you love and feel yourself loving them. You couldn’t love them unless you already love yourself; so, transfer that love to yourself. Feel the love, and allow your self-love to blossom and grow.

Keeping it Simple

Breathwork, Laughter, Healthy Relationships, Pets, Acceptance, and Spirituality are mindfulness skills, tools, and ways of Being that bring peace and calm assurance into your life; and help you feel more capable and secure, loved and loving.

Keep it simple.  Acknowledge every success, no matter how small.  Celebrate milestones.  Record positive changes and be patient and kind with yourself as you evolve and grow.

At times, the road may be rocky.  Life may throw you a few curve balls, and your mindfulness practice may not seem to work.  Keep going.  Keep practicing and applying yourself.  Never give up.  Breathe and keep coming back to your heart.  

Mindfulness is not just a series of practices, it’s a way of Being that, with daily engagement, becomes an intrinsic part of who you are.

Like children, we all need time outs. Time to be by ourselves and with our feelings.  Time to ponder our actions and how kind and caring we’ve been, where we need to pick up our game, be a better friend to ourselves, and apologize for giving into guilt and shame and buying into stories that only serve to bring us down.

When we were children, timeouts were mandated as punishments:

"Go to your room. Think about what you have done.

Wait till your father gets home. What’s the matter with you?"

Now we can upgrade our timeouts to a welcomed respite from the rest of the world, to spend time in nature or in a place that exudes peace, a loving sanctuary where no one judges us, including ourselves.

The internet, computer screens, and cell phones sap our energy. 

Whatever happened to live conversations, getting to know each other, and hanging out?  Whatever happened to a quiet time when nothing much was happening, spending time reading a book, just hanging out?

Sometimes when we have still moments, we don’t know what to do with ourselves. 

The world has quieted down but we’re still spinning, our mind is running at warp speed and our resting pulse feels like it’s running a 10K. 

We need to retrain our bodies, minds, and emotions to deactivate hyperdrive, breathe deeply, and be with ourselves.

It’s not rocket science. It’s common sense from the heart.  Overstimulation is impacting our health, disconnecting us from nature, and impacting our ability to give and receive love.  Less is more.

Going from 75 mph to 40 could tax our patience, leading to irritability and a ‘let’s go, let’s go already!” mentality.  And slowing down from warp to docking speed could be our time to breathe out, be grateful for the journey, and feel into the learning, what we’ve learned, and how we’ve grown. 

It’s our perspective and attitude that matters.  It’s our outlook on life that helps to set the table for what comes next. 

If you were to schedule your next timeout, where would you go? How would it be? 

Part of the wonder of timeouts is planning and visualizing the journey. 

What will I do?

How will it be to slow down, ponder, journal, and reflect?

How can I bring myself with calm assurance?

How can I arrive with generosity of spirit in my heart?

There is no ‘getting there’. We will always be a work in progress no matter how much we wake up to our hearts’ knowing. No matter how much we evolve and grow.

Timeouts are intermezzos, the sorbet that cleanses our palate between the events of our life.

Timeouts give us a fresh start. They help us to close the book where the learning is complete, the lesson is over, we get it, and have integrated it into our hearts.

Timeouts help us to place that book back on the shelf; it's served its purpose, and it's time to let go.

Timeouts give us the space to close the door of the old behind us and walk through that new door that’s been beaconing to us, waiting for us to have the courage and wisdom to know that the new is there for us.

Timeouts are a time for heartfelt gratitude for the learning and growth, for curiosity and a sense of wonder about what comes next, what new adventures are possible.

There’s time and space to be at peace with our mistakes, to drop the judgment, and to love and nurture ourselves.  Time to rediscover ourselves with a thankful heart.

Timeouts are an important part of life. 

And, if the truth be told, we can breathe and be with ourselves every day, welcoming a moment or two or more to invite a timeout into our heart of hearts, to be with ourselves, to love ourselves and the journey, to love life and the gift of being embodied on Planet Earth with an accelerated opportunity to be more, do less and grow.

The more we appreciate these moments, our timeouts, the more we love ourselves enough to make them a part of our lives, the more the universe inside of us opens and we can remember who we are and why we’re here:

I am an aspect of Source.

I am grateful to be here now.

I am choosing to bring love to everything in my life.

One of the best ways to reduce stress and feel better on all levels is exercise. 

There are many options for cardiovascular fitness, strength training, flexibility, and overall wellness, catering to our preferences and fitness levels.   

For example, there’s

Yoga

Pilates

Walking

Running / Jogging

Cycling

Swimming

Dance (e.g., Zumba, ballet, salsa)

Hiking

Strength training (weightlifting)

Barre workouts

Group Fitness classes (e.g. HIIIT, boot camp)

Aerobics

Kickboxing

Water aerobics

Tai Chi

Indoor cycling (spin classes)

Tennis

Pickleball

Golf

Rock climbing

Bodyweight exercises (e.g. calisthenics, TRX)

CrossFit

Martial arts (e.g. karate, taekwondo)

When we have a regular exercise or movement schedule, our body changes, and we are positively transformed and uplifted by the experience. 

Regular exercise:

Boosts our stamina and energy levels, helping us stay alert and productive throughout the day.

Promotes better concentration and cognitive function, enabling us to tackle tasks with clarity and efficiency.

Triggers the release of endorphins, which alleviates stress and improves mood helping us cope with the demands of work and life effectively.

Regulates sleep patterns, ensuring we get the rest we need for optimal performance at work.

Fosters a sense of accomplishment and self-assurance, empowering us to take on challenges and assert ourselves professionally.

Strengthens our immune system, enhancing our well-being and health.

Enhances cognitive function and creativity, leading to improved problem-solving and productivity.

Reduces the risk of chronic diseases and enhances our quality of life.

Prioritizing

No matter what gets in the way - time constraints, fatigue, lack of motivation, guilt, convenience or access to classes or facilities  - we can find positive ways to prioritize our physical/emotional/mental health and fitness.

For example, we can:

Schedule exercise sessions like any other appointment and make them non-negotiable.

Incorporate short bursts of activity throughout the day, like taking the stairs and doing desk exercises during breaks.

Get up earlier in the morning for a workout or use our lunch break for a quick gym session or walk.

Make sure we are getting enough sleep, which exercise helps us experience.

Choose activities we enjoy and find energizing.

Break our workouts into shorter sessions if we’re feeling tired or drained.

Set specific achievable goals and track our progress to stay motivated.

Find a workout buddy or join group classes to add a social element.

Mix up our workouts to keep them interesting and fun.

Remember that exercise is an investment in ourselves, and it benefits those around us.

Make it a family affair by taking a hike, going for a bike ride, or playing active games together.

Work out at home, take online fitness classes, or run, hike, or bike from home.

Incorporate physical activity into our daily routine, such as walking or biking to work if feasible.

Why Don't We? A Psychological Key to Success

Even when we know that exercise and staying fit are important, even when we are unhappy with our weight, stamina, and strength, why do we continue to do little or nothing?

Have you ever noticed that people who smoke cigarettes know that smoking kills you and yet continue to smoke? How can they do that?

They continue to smoke because smoking killing you is not real to them. They don't see themselves as sick or dying, even if they've had a smoker's cough for years.

But, if they find out that they have lung cancer or some stage of lung disease, that all changes.  They become aware that they are actually dying, and the reality of smoking becomes real and personal to them.

My mother was a pack-and-a-half-per-day smoker for 20+ years.  As a child, I tried to get her to quit by drawing skulls and cross bones on her cartons of cigarettes. It didn't change her behavior.  She just got angry with me.

I was surprised when I came home for the holidays during my freshman year of college and she had quit.  She became aware of a scratchy sensation in her throat that she had never experienced before and became scared.

So she went to her doctor, got the nicotine patch, and quit. That was it.  She never smoked another cigarette until the day she died twenty-five years later.

She allowed change to move through her and created a new, healthier reality for herself.

So don't wait until your bones are brittle and you fall, or you are huffing and puffing and can barely walk up a flight of stairs, or whatever your threshold of pain is to implement change.

Set realistic and doable goals now.

Do things that may challenge you but you enjoy.

Acknowledge your weekly accomplishments and monthly milestones.

Celebrate the changes you see and feel in your body, mind, and heart.

Embrace the joy of self-care.

What truly matters to you in your personal and professional life? 

When you say yes to opportunities, experiences, and lifestyle choices aligned with your values and say no to those that are not, doors open to a more joyful and meaningful life.

So let's uncover your core values and decide how to best work with them.

Step 1: Determining our core values.

From the list below, choose and write down every core value that resonates with you. 

This is not a thinking exercise. It’s a feeling one. 

Relax and Breathe

So let's relax your nervous system and be fully present here now. 

Sit in a comfortable chair, your feet flat on the floor uncrossed and your spine straight. 

Close your eyes or gaze down, whatever is most relaxing for you. 

Breathe in through your nose and out through your nose, with the out-breath longer than the in-breath. 

Breathe like this at least 10 times.

Then as you breathe in, breathe in gratitude for making this time for yourself, and breathe out any stress or tension in your body; let it go. 

Breathe like this 10 times or more as well.

Notice how you feel as you continue to breathe and relax.

Create Your List

In this calm, relaxed state, read through the list below and write down any words that feel like core values.

If words come to you that are not on the list, write them down as well. 

Step 2: Group Similar Values

Group all similar values in a way that makes sense to you, by what you feel goes together. Create no more than five groups.  If you create more, drop the least important group(s) to you.

For example:

Group 1:  Courageous, Decisiveness, Dedication, Innovation, Originality

Group 2:  Resourcefulness, Risk Taking, Preparedness, Resilience, Responsibility

Group 3: Empathy, Compassion, Fairness, Cooperation, Loyalty

Group 4: Calmness, Acceptance, Grace, Service, Spirituality

Step 3:   Choose Key Words

Choose one word from each group that represents the label for the entire group and circle it.  Again, this is a feeling choice, not a thinking choice. There are no right or wrong answers. It’s about your first impression, a feeling impression.

For example:

Group 1:  Decisiveness

Group 2: Preparedness

Group 3: Empathy

Group 4: Acceptance

Group 5: Flexibility

Step 4: Add a Verb to Each Value

Add a verb to each value, so you see it as an actionable value. 

For example:

Choose decisiveness.

Promote preparedness.

Model empathy.

Live in acceptance.

Act with flexibility.

Write your statements down to remind and guide you to live more purposely. 

Step 5: Prioritize Your List

Finally, write your core-value statements in order of priority.

For example:

Live in acceptance.

Model empathy.

Promote preparedness.

Choose decisiveness.

Act with flexibility.

Post your value statements so that they are visible and accessible.

Know that they are there when you need to make decisions.

Be grateful they are there to remind you what's important to you and the kind of person you are choosing to be.

And Remember

You are still evolving and growing. 

You're not the same person you were ten years ago, and you'll be different five years from now. 

So, revisit your core values periodically and keep your vision of where you are headed, your alignment, and who you are choosing to be, current and meaningful to you in a heartfelt way.