Several times a year, I take 3 or 4 planes to arrive in Perth, Australia.

It’s a 40+ hour journey, including layovers and an early arrival at the first airport when traveling international.  People tell me all the time that they ‘couldn’t’ do it and don’t know how I do it. It’s just a state of mind, an attitude, a willingness to be a part of the journey without attachment to when you arrive, as weird as this sounds.

During the trip, time blurs into one continual space. It’s hard to describe. There is no day or night. It’s all just part of the journey, kind of like being in assisted living, having television entertainment and all your meals prepared and handed to you and not remembering what day it is.

There are some tips that help the trip (and life) go more smoothly.

Eat Healthy

Bring snacks that you and your body love, that can sustain you if you don’t like the food provided.

Be Comfortable

Wear loose comfortable clothing and bring a sweater or something to wrap around you; even with the blankets provided, the planes can be cold.

Reboot

Bring a change of clothes; after 15 hours or so, clean clothes are amazing.

Shower 

Know where the showers are in each airport; sometimes you need to buy a day-pass at Delta or United, but the shower is so worth it, and the food and drinks provided plus the quiet atmosphere versus the hustle and bustle of the rest of the airport are lovely.

Be Patient

Practice patience: going through customs can be slow and cumbersome; listen to music, calm your mind, know and see yourself on the other side of bureaucracy.

How you experience travel (and life!) is your choice.  

Airport security

Is it really protecting us or about power and control? It is as it is. So, prepare for it, and accept it as a necessary step to get where you are going.

Feeling tired and out of sorts because of lack of sleep

Is it a terminal disease or minor inconvenience? There’s nothing like a good night’s sleep on the other end to comfort the body and get back on track. Know and see yourself well-rested and relaxed in your ‘new home’ at your destination.

So, here's my takeaway 

Your leadership skills depend on who you bring to the table, your attitude and outlook, your state of Being, all the right tools are useless if you are not in that healthy, self-loving space to apply them.

Let go of opinions and preconceived ideas of how things should be and dance with what’s presented. Go with the flow and bring your best self to all you be and do.

Effective delegating is crucial to your success.  As your business grows or as responsibilities increase, you can’t do everything you have been doing and be successful.  Mundane, repetitive tasks will hold you back. Handling projects that others could do just as effectively or better is a waste of your time and resources.

You probably know this, so what's stopping you from delegating?

Maybe you don't trust your people to do the job as good as you do.  Maybe you're afraid they will just create a mess for you clean up or won't get everything done on time. All valid concerns.  So where to from here?

Here are four simple steps to get you going and delegating like a superhero!

Step 1: Get out of the Way.

Don’t make delegation about you.  Delegating does not mean that you are losing control or that you can’t handle something. Delegating means that you know how to get more done by utilizing the resources you have at hand – your people, division or team.

Step 2: Help Your People Succeed:

Don’t withhold information.  Be direct, clear and precise.  Talk to them.  Give them written instructions that are easy to follow. Tell them what, when and how each step or task much be completed, what milestones must be met and by when, what needs to be on your desk for review and when, what skills are needed, what resources are available to get the job done.

Put yourself in their shoes.  Make sure that you provide what they need to really shine.

Step 3: Stay in Touch.

Don’t disappear after delegating. Check in regularly.  Make sure that your people feel safe to bring any question, problem or concern to you, that there are no ‘stupid questions’.

You are there to catch small problems before they become big ones.  Remember what it was like to be in their shoes; be respectful, engaging and supportive.  Be patient and encouraging, and maintain appropriate boundaries.  It’s not okay to drop the job back in your lap if difficulties arise or obstacles occur.

Step 4: Maintain & Build Trust.

Don’t take a task back once it’s been delegated. That undermines confidence and can make you look power hungry and possessive, a micromanager.

Give your people the chance to do the job.  Just like you, they need to be mentored and groomed for success; it's about you embracing this kind of high-level leadership, and in so doing, success is assured.

Your people's success begets more success. Their success if your success.

I attended a networking educational event recently, which is not my favorite activity. 

Why? Most people are so intent on getting business that they feel rushed and anxious, hoping to make the right connection, land the new, fantastic client, experience a major shift in their financial status.

It reminds me of watching old movies or television shows.

On Netflix, I recently watched a few episodes of The Dick Van Dyke Show, considered one of those television classics, a weekly show that ran from 1961 – 1966.

I felt drawn to watch a few episodes and every scene felt endless, so different from the pace of today’s world. I felt myself just wanting to know how everything turned out instead of enjoying the lightness, comedy and drama of it all.

I found myself wondering, back to networking, how we can enjoy more moments of our business that involves connecting with clients and potential clients, finding those experiences more enjoyable, as a process, instead of hoping to get to the punch line (more business) as soon as possible. 

Anxiety is fear and pushes away what we want to accomplish. People can feel our hurriedness and the pressure we are putting on ourselves, and that’s not good for business.

I decided to change my mindset; choose a new attitude; just be genuinely curious, and it worked. More enjoyment of networking events. More relaxed and in the moment. More of a positive magnet to create what I am aligning to in life.

It’s simple. See if this works for you. Simply focus on engaging with one person, wherever you are, and having a meaningful conversation. What are her interests? Hobbies? Recent adventures? Obstacles in her life?

Listen. Ask a few questions. Give them your undivided attention. Be genuinely curious. Get their contact information if that feels appropriate; you can send her something later.

This is such a gift we can give to people, the gift of being heard, the gift of someone not checking their cell phone for messages or texting, the gift of having someone just listening to us.

And it takes the stress away because we stop worrying about results.  Results happen over time, when we follow up, see them again (or not . . . that’s life!)

Like the Dick Van Dyke Show, the laughter and connections build over time.  One step, one breath, one moment at a time, so we can enjoy those ‘boring’ meetings and get-togethers and be more of the genuine superstar marketer, authentic, real and caring, who we already are inside!

There are only two ways to influence human behavior: love and fear.  With love, we inspire people to buy our products or services. With fear, we manipulate them. 

Businesses, political groups etc. easily resort to manipulation. Manipulation techniques work in the short-term. But, they do not breed loyalty and the gains are not long lasting.

With manipulation, our products or services become a commodity. We try to get people to buy by:

offering cash back

slashing the price

adding new features

running promotions

We use strategies like

peer pressure

aspirational advertising

fear-based advertising

When we drop our prices low enough or offer promotions like buy one get one free or two for the price of one, people buy from us. But at what cost?

Slashing prices and running promotions are not good for business. Clients expect a bargain and wait for sales to avoid paying full price. The cash-back or rebate business can be deceptive. Some sellers have so many conditions attached to their rebates that a lot of buyers pay full price. They either fail to follow complex rebate instructions or encounter a loophole that precludes them from participating.

Novelty items like a new flavor of toothpaste or a new feature on an existing product can also drive sales.  Again, this is temporary. It doesn't last.

Peer pressure advertisements include:

celebrity endorsements

professional endorsements: 4 out of 5 dentists prefer Trident; a double-blind study at a top university concluded that . . .

don't-miss-out advertisements: with over a million satisfied customers and counting . . . 75% of your competitors are using our service, why aren’t you?

Fear-based messages motivate us to move away from something.

L’Oreal’s tag line of “Because I’m Worth It” targets self-loathing in women.

FedEx’s “Absolutely, Positively Overnight” addresses our fear of missing a deadline.

Nike’s “Just Do It” capitalizes on our fear of missing out.

Aspirational messages tempt us with something we want and are afraid we can’t get.

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Manipulation creates massive stress for buyers and sellers alike. When there are conflicting advertisements and many brands to choose from, buyers can’t tell which one is best for them and feel stressed.  The competition to continually produce new and improved brands is hard work. The long-term effects of making short-term decisions are lower profit margins and higher stress levels in business.

Stress is the silent killer.  With stress, cortisol is released into our system which increases blood pressure, decreases cognitive ability, increases aggression and selfish behavior and makes us more vulnerable to disease. 

Employees filled with cortisol are less productive, innovative and reliable.  Consumers in cortisol fight-or-flight mode want to feel better.  Being manipulated to buy your company's product or service may give them temporary relief, but that doesn't equate to long-term loyalty or commitment to your what you offer.

Using manipulation as a means to an end is negatively affecting our health and wellbeing on many levels.  It is the anthesis to success.  How can we influence human behavior with love?  Love is the answer.